Who is Bene Factres?

Mrs. Malaprop meets Fr. Maciel in this very punny page for the Enlightened English speaker with a good command of Mexican and Legion/Regnum Christi life

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

His Holiness was Here!

 I had the privilege of a private audience with the papacy

in his private chambers at the Apostolic Annunciation in Washington, DC,

And not because I had refused to hand out marriage licences to contra-naturam or

because I had been abused by Catholic priests (well, only a little bit, and that did not qualify because it was by a nun Sister Mary Achinhead the foundress of the Daughters of the Sacred Heart of the Holy Spirity Discalced)

And not because I had just founded a new order splinter group from Fr. Maciel's Regnum Christi promoters of the Mysterious Mysteries of the Holy Rosary, "Free at Last!"

And not because I am a staunch defender of Greek Un-Orthodox priestly celibassy

or because I organized the World Day of Families in Philadelphia to keep the masses going to mass

NO! it was because I was the mother of two sons, one an imprisioned Conscientious Objector against the war in Iraq Iran and Axles of Evil, the other a reservist who killed as many as he could and now hospitalized with PTSD at Veterans Administration....The Pope understands my Pain.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

My Herniatus

I must beg the pardon of my ardent followers who seek me with baited breath and have not found me as the Holy Scripture says as they seek me like the  dear seeks water in the woods. But urgent business took me overseas to Irak to see the aftermath of my son's involvement in that just war brought on by Sad-dam Hussein and his Evil Empire that wanted to wipe out civilization until he met his Waterlew at the hands of our fearful leader who often jumped before he leaped in pursuit of truth and justice for all man or should I say human kind to include women and children.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Eliza Lynch, President of Paraguay's Paramour and Patriot is Bene factress' great grandmother


A little know fact is that Eliza Lynch from Co. Cork, Ireland became a Paraguay heroine by a very tortuous path

What is less known is that Bene Factress is her direct descendent and that Bene's letters were collected by her son ROMULO LYNCH-SOLANO:  see the author ship which you may have overlooked in your zeal to pick holes in the Hull of her head piece forgiving my mixed metamorphosis.


Eliza Lynch, the Irish woman became ‘national heroine’ of South American country in the late 1800s.
Eliza Lynch, the ‘Queen of Paraguay,’ is to be honored in a commemorative weekend in her native Charleville in Cork on September 19-20.

Lynch was born in Charleville in 1833 to John and Elizabeth (nee Lloyd) Lynch. Her father was in the medical profession and moved in the upper echelons of society.

Lynch was the lover of the 19th century Paraguayan dictator Francisco Solano Lopez and the mother of his seven children. 

She also became a national heroine in her adopted country. She fought alongside Lopez during the War of the Triple Alliance (1864-1870) in which Paraguay was fighting against Brazil, Argentina and Uruguay.

Lopez and the couple’s eldest son were both killed in the war in 1870. Lynch buried them in the jungle with her bare hands.

In 2009, Michael Lillis and Ronan Fanning published ‘The Lives of Eliza Lynch— Scandal & Courage’ which revealed Eliza’s Irish origins and her marriage at the age of 16 to a duplicitous French Army officer. In the book they reconstructed the systematic invention of her image as a prostitute around her first meeting with Solano Lopez, which occurred in Paris in 1854, the Irish Independent reports.

The commemorative weekend will include a seminar on her life by Lillis and Fanning and a screening of a film about her starring Maria Doyle Kennedy.

In 2013, Lynch’s great grandson, His Excellency Miguel Angel Solano Lopez, the ambassador of Paraguay to Ireland, visited Charleville to visit her birthplace.

Monday, December 29, 2014

BENE FACTRESS OF THE LEGION OF CHRISIS EX-POUNDS (she is losing weight!) On the Mystery of the Incarnation in the life of Fr. Marcial Maciel Degollado



On the Mystery of the Incarnation in the life of Fr. Marcial Maciel Degollado (his mother) Charismatic Leader of said Legion of Christ (dis)Order and the Reno Christie’s Movement

15 Holy Rosary Drive, Emmitsburg, Maryland, USA

January 1, 2015
(Urbi et Orbi Press pre-release of world-changing document)

Hello, Bene Factress Followers,
I know you all have been waiting with baited breath for this my latest salvo to celebrate the Incardination of Our Savior a deep theological mystery that not even Pope Francis understands because it is a “Mystery of Faith” Mysterion as they say in Greek and which was the language of the Five Gospels before being translated into Latin by the Romans –are your following?- who wanted everyone including Christians to speak the lingua franca –not French but Latin- of the whole Empire Rome being the umbilicus mundi which I will not translate so as not to scandalize minors especially those educated in Catholic Schools and particularmente –forgive my Spanish- in the Legion of Crisis schools for the rich and famous where their minds are as chaste as snow like Shakespeare would say or as Sister Angelica might exclaim “as pure as the driven snow” to describe the special purity of sellybate priests who have castrated themselves for the Kingdom of Christ (that’s what the Latin words Regnum Christi mean) as Jesus himself said in an intimate moment.
Purity being the special Charism of the Legion as bequeathed to them by their Holy Founder, Martial Maciel, who like St. Paul was ruptured up to the Seventh Heaven during one of his medication trips while he frolicked with the underage children of God in the infirmary on 677 Via Appia/Aurelia coming out of one of his stupors he asked his spiritual son “Quo Vadis?” and he replied “To get you more medications, Beloved Father” “Go in Peace” Thus blest he took his leave of the Holy Founder and made for the Salvator Mundi Hospital where swallowing his self-respect he would wheedle a refill of the controlled substance from the de-Moor nuns.
The Anals of the Legion of Christ tell many other edifying stories of the Holy Man’s struggles with the Demon Demerol which he resisted bravely in the manner of Oscar Wilde who said verbatim I can resist anything except temptation. Temptation for our holy man was also Incarnate in the form of innocent and defenseless boys under his pastoral care “Suffer the little blond children to come to me” being his constant prayer and desire…while other holy men stood by silently scratching their curly hair and letting things happen which should never have happened abandoning the sheep to the ravening wolf while they sat in their ivory palaces on the Via della Conciliazione counting their pasta, eating alla puttanesca and drinking exquisite vino Fracassati and the odd bottle of Fundador brandy gifted by the Founder as they basket amid their lavish furniture, decorations and lap dogs…

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Bene Factress of the Legion of CRISIS mentions her Sensuous Legs!!!

Dear multiple personality followers,

it is my pleasure to resume my correspondence with y'all (because of my Southern tides) as summer turns into autumn and I wax poetic on my still sensuous legs that have been a source of temptation for many Legionaries of Christ who have sheepishly made me pastoral visits at my home on Rosary Drive, Emmitsburg, MD, USA, visits may I say which were approved by their spiritual directors because I am a faithful benefactress -hence my pen name- of the Work of God.

I am amazed how some unfaithful people, who may even consider themselves Catholics, continue to sniper at the Legion and its Regnum Christi Movement although there is a lot of discussion among the rancor and file about which comes first the Legion or the Regnum. This is a source of deep teleological discussions among both sets of members -or one set depending on your point of view.  Hence what I am saying is that one can consider the Regnum Christi a (s)pawn of the Legion or that the Regnum Christi was in pectore of the Founder from the very beginning when he began to form groups of pubescent followers in the seminaries he was later ejected from because evil Jesuits were envious of his New Order.

I am so scandalized by people when they begrudge the Work of God its Power and the Glory when ours is a Triumphal Arche God who wants his followers to live the Gospel of Property and Prosperity and to fill the coiffeurs -forgive my French- of INTEGER HOMO and the Vatican Opere delle Religioni false so beloved by his Holiness now Saint John Paul II that his successor put a Legionary of Christ, Fr. Monsignor, Fernando Verzas Alzala as its head to insure no one would pilfer from it or chiffon off funds for the Legion's seminaries and Father Maciel's charitable works for vulnerable widows in Madrid and Cortija.

I am so incensed that I need a break to take my blood pressure medication from Obamacare. Hasta la vista babies (I am Pro-Life that is why I use the plural)

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Cardinal Vellatio Enjoyed working with Legionaries of Crisis!


Hello, dear friends and multiple followers

Benefactress is commenting on the latest developments of the Legion of Christ or Crisis since the passing of their beloved Founder Father Maciel who passed.... to a new life never speak ill of the dead as my mother would say even if he was a Dirty Rotten Scoundrel as the movie shows whose hyperactive pecker it was posthumously discovered after his death had wreaked havoc I must speak classically on Jew and Gentile no matter their age, gender, sexual orientation or religious persuasion as is written in the Book of Sonoma and Go'morra (Irish version) that he committed abominations back and forth "And if should find 10 just men -the Bible did not count women- would you spare the city, Lord?" asked Abraham the father of all believers and no longer the wandering Jew on the Gaza Strip Club.
Our man, Marvellous Maciel, the conjurer and perjurer, jugular  and ventriloquist, also wanted to be the Father of a Multitude in the spirit first when he founded the order and later in the flesh which after dwelling among males decided to try his weapon among the daughters of Israel focusing latterly on  Brune-Hilda Garcia the Chaste when he impersonated a CIA agent who could not reveal his identity for fear of the vengeance of Mexican Drug Cartels specifically the Michoacan Family which he feared would castrate him in an act of Christian Charity this being the principal virtue of his order which he founded to comfort the rich and afflict the poor as a modern day Hood Robin with reverse perverse psychology who in the late XX Century roamed the forest of Lomas de Chapultepec Mexico City Hoodwinking the rich and poor windows to fund his forays into orphanages where he could find vulnerable boys to groom for his sexual pleasure and for the Catholic priesthood.
But his egregious spiritual sons and daughters aided by Holy Mother the Church in the personal of his Eminence Cardinal Felasio de Paolis and the Extraordinary General Chapter, January-February 2014,  had eschewed him as a depraved prick I quote ad litteram, devoid of human decency they have finally separated themselves from their Sinful Source who never gave them their charism that is specific spiritual gift and characteristic in the first place but that it came directly from God as an Immaculate Conception from the Holy Spirit Deus ex Machina as Ray Bradbury would say.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

St. Patricks Day and Checking out Condoms in Florida


Hello, readers
I am writing from the luxury passenger lounge in the  Spirit Wing at BWI airpot sitting in a very comfortable armchair as I sip on what my hermanos cubanos in Miami and Gloria Esteinham call "la mentirilla" containing my favorite fix the stable of our childrens school meals Coke as in my son Romeo's  addictive movie Scarface. But anywho getting back to the meat of the subject I would like to share this experience (interrupted by a snow drift that clogged up my computer)

Because I am entering into the senior citizen sect after consulting with my Legionary of Christ spiritual director - I had to SKYPE him because he is on sebatical in Ireland his native country or origin which is another reason I have always been enamoured of Fr. X because of his strong Irish features and his gift of the gab he was like St. Kevin himself in Glenda Lock who could charm the birds out of the trees and have you at eights and nines when he was talking about his seminarians in Cheshire who needed a roof over the heads, were running out of stocks and sometimes had their inferiors freezing in the winter because the Legion could not afford to pay the heating- I headed for Florida, the sunshine sake and the refuge of all old people in Freedom, Equality and Justice except for taxes on the middle classes.